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  • Gavin Conochie

Holding Ground for Ourselves

Updated: Oct 26, 2019


Often, when we are struggling with strong emotions, we take it as a sign that something is 'wrong.' We sense ourselves approaching the limit of our capacity to be with our experience, and something in us instinctively wants to contract, to shrink away from the discomfort.

There is an opportunity here if we wish to take it, an invitation. We can choose to ask ourselves at this point: 'How would it be to stay in this place a little while longer?' What happens if we invite ourselves to notice how uncomfortable we feel, if we become aware of the desire to return to familiar ground, to where we feel safe?

We can notice the thoughts that come, the desire to escape. Perhaps we can also notice an urge to distract ourselves in some way, to be somewhere else, to do something else. Here, at the working edge of our capacity, is the place where real change can happen. Right in the discomfort zone, where the envelope of our being is being stretched. Here we have an opportunity to grow larger, to expand our sense of ourselves to accommodate the increased volume of life energy, of feeling, of sensation that is filling our awareness.

Whatever it is we're feeling - even if there's fear present - it's all just life energy in the end. In this moment, exiled parts of ourselves are knocking at the door. They're not trying to harm us; they’re not here to give us a hard time. They're just asking to come home. How would it be to make some more room inside ourselves, to welcome a little more life force back into our system, knowing there’s no need to rush things; no need to force anything; no need to overwhelm ourselves?

Just making space for what wants to come, a little at a time...trusting our capacity to be with what is. And knowing that, if we can't find it in ourselves to do that right now, then that's ok too. There'll be another opportunity. Life never gives up on us. We are always given another chance.

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